A Sun sets
Something is setting. Digging deep to find a safer ground.
Taking away all the possible endings.
Something is vanishing.
Freezing and dying.
Something is aching, because decisions hurt. The last hope for a long lost tomorrow, sustained by the vain promise of a far maybe, collapsing right before my eyes.
I'm torn. I'm wasted. I'm so tired... I want to stop.
When part of you die, you fight bravely to save it, but you must admit defeat and let go.
Let go til you can't. Can't stand.
So different, and not wrong... different concepts of something that should be balanced, harmonized...
So wasted... tired of fighting a lost battle.
"Ten years", she said, "It's how I am", he said.
And I ache.
There's no way. No light. No hope... Not anymore.
No more fighting, no more battles.
Admiting defeat is no act for the greater good; it's just giving up, it's just seeing there's absolutely no way.
Sick... sick of tears, worries....
Enough of these.
So many uncertainties...
"I don't want it, god damn it! Don't want it to happen", I scream inside. But what's the point in screaming when you are alone? Who do you want to impress? And why would you do such a foolishness?
Begging is so harmful...
All I want to do is to hide... to be someone else... to stop...
I'm not strong, I'm really a frightened little being that wants to be happy but fails....
And keeps on failing, and disappointing and bothering....
But no morrors now, I ask for mercy....
So wasted and tired of letting people down...
So meaningless....
Even at the very end I have hopes. I listen to a noise. My heart races... But no, of course not.. what a dream, little dreamer girl... Do you feel ashamed? Do you feel lifeless as you see your hopes being torn from you once more? Do you feel like dying?
Did you choose to try again? And again? And forever?
But what can you do? What will you do? You will diminidh and become a pale shadow of who you used to be, of what you used to have....
I pitty you.... So desperatelly looking for solid ground when the sea has buried into the sand...
Waiting....
On serenity, on hope....
On the turn of my tide...
But I can't change who I am.... I preferred I could. But still can't....
And so sets a Sun, in a wide ocean of salt tears, but don't they all?